Breathe
by Little Miss Juliet
Summary: Almost 6 months have passed since Beast Boy last saw the girl he thought was Terra. He hasn't healed yet, but he's starting to. He just needs to breathe. :: BBxR friendship, ONESHOT.


**_Beast Boy_**

5 months, 2 weeks, and 4 days since I last saw _her_. Terra. It has to be her. It just _has_ to be. Everything points to it: her hair, her eyes, her voice, her body, the statue being gone...everything. It just has to be.

I roll over from my side onto my back, morphing to human from dog as I do so. I've been sleeping in Terra's room ever since I saw her. I can't believe I just walked away like that. I just _let_ her disappear into the crowd. I should've gone after her. But it's not like she wanted me to. Terra's moved on. She's not Terra. But somewhere, deep inside of her, she's there. The laughing, happy, bubbly, beautiful Terra is still there. She still exists somewhere. I need to find her. I can't give up on her. I'll never forgive myself if I let that be the last time I ever see her. I'll be damned if I don't try. I won't be able to live with myself if I _know_ I didn't try my hardest to save our relationship. I just can't. I can't let her go.

I'll start over. I can. I really can. We can just start out as friends and then maybe date and then maybe get to where we never got to go when she was on the team. Just a second chance. Anything...

The wetness on my cheeks causes my eyes to snap open. I've started to cry again. I sit up and wipe my eyes. A large sigh escapes me and I let my gaze trace the contours of Terra's room, out the window and across the bay to the city. The orange and yellow tinged sky turns the skyline into a silhouette as the sun turns the water the same color as the sky.

Terra's rejection has also turned me into an amatuer poet.

"Robin! It is nearly time for supper! Shall I get Beast Boy?"

My ears perk at Starfire's muffled voice saying my name. I hear my stomach audibly growl at the mention of food, but I feel myself instinctively shrink away from the door.

"No," Robin says sharply. Pause. "No," he repeats in a more gentle tone, "let Beast Boy join us...if he wants. He is more than welcome to and we would be more than happy to have him" I shiver, knowing that last bit was more directed at me and not our friend.

"Oh...okay," Starfire murmurs in a deflated voice. I feel my heart break just a little, knowing for the past 5 and a half months, she's been asking to get me for dinner and for the past 5 and a half months, Robin's been telling her no. She asks in the same hopeful, happy tone. I hate to be pushing them away. My friends—

"Beast Boy will be ready when he wants to. This has been pretty hard on him," I hear Cyborg say. I can almost see him put a hand on Starfire's shoulder while looking at the door to Terra's room.

"He just needs time Starfire. I'm sure he understands that you want to comfort him," Raven says. "We all do." Raven. Raven knows me pretty damn well. She must know how this feels.

"I know...I just wish he'd let us help him," Starfire says sadly. My heart goes out to her. If there's anything more I hate than losing Terra, it's making Starfire cry. Starfire's one of my best friends! Like the sister I never had! She's done so much for me. I love her, I really do. I love all of them. They're my family. This hurts. I hurt. I need to be with them. I—

_CLANG_

In my haste to stand up, I knock something over. Something metalic. I look down to see the heart shaped box that I made for Terra, the still-shiny lid showing me my reflection.

My heart stops for a moment. I bend down slowly and pick up the box. I turn it over a few times in my hands, opening and closing it. I take a deep breath and frown. This isn't healthy for me. Terra's moved on. I should to. If I stay miserable, Slade will win in a cruel, twisted, indirect way. And I can't let that happen.

Something jolts through me—adrenaline?—and after 5 months, 2 weeks and 4 days of moping and feeling sorry for myself, something changes.

_I know what I have do to._

I clutch the box tightly and slide the door open. Everyone's moved into the Ops Room for dinner, so the coast is clear. Despite this, I look both ways before bolting down the hall to the stair well.

Laughter.

I stop for a moment at the door to the stairs. Starfire's windchime giggle, Cyborg's booming chortle, Robin's relaxed chuckle and Raven's soft snicker. My ears drop at the fact that I'm not in there with them. But I will be. My brow knits as I let the door close behind me.

**_Raven_**

I'm laughing with my friends (something that I've been able to do more easily since the end of my father's hold over me and the regime of the Brotherhood of Evil) when I sense something: a change in energy flow.

Beast Boy has left Terra's room.

He's been in there so often and so long that my aura has adjustec to him being there. Now he's left. Headed up the stairs. Something is either going right or very, very wrong. I frown. Cyborg is still doing impressions of famous people I have no care for and Starfire's still laughing. She's holder her stomach, she's laughing so hard. Robin keeps trying to compose himself, but between Cyborg's jokes and Starfire's infectious laugh, it's a difficult task for him. But the knowledge of Beast Boy leaving Terra's room has sobered me up.

I stand.

"Excuse me," I say. It goes unobserved except for Robin, who lightly raises a masked eyebrow. A moment of unspoken communication passes and he turns back to Cyborg and Starfire. I exit the Ops Room swiftly and efficiently.

Beast Boy's on the roof. I can feel it. I am beginning to open the door to the stairs before the worst comes to mind and I shift into my soul self and melt easily through the ceiling.

The light, despite its dull hue, blinds me temporarily. I blink to adjust and find Beast Boy sitting on the edge of the roof. My footsteps are light and silent as I approach, the only sound coming from the light swish of my cloak. The sound of his voice makes me jump.

"You didn't have to come up you know." He sounds hoarse. I realize this must be the first time he's spoken in...a while.

"I know." I pause. "I thought you'd want company." I stand beside him before ultimately deciding to sit down. I can see him watching me as I do so. I look at him and he cracks a small smile before it fades. We turn to face the horizon.

"I saw her." I frown slightly.

"I know."

"She...she wanted nothing to do with me."

"I know."

"She...said that...Terra's just a memory now..."

"I know."

"She said she had to go..." Beast Boy's voice cracks and I whip my head to face him. His face is in his hands and his shoulders are shaking. I'm uncomfortable. I'm not good with this. This—emotional comfort—is usually Starfire or Cyborg or even Beast Boy's job. Not mine. I place my right hand on his back and rub in slow, circular motions.

Beast Boy lets out a sob and throws his arms around me. I stiffen up but try to relax for his sake.

"Beast Boy...Gar..."

"I can't! I can't just let her go! Not like this!" He sobs, tears streaming down his face and onto my lap.

"I know, Beast Boy, I know..." I murmur quietly.

"I'm being punished for caring! I loved her so much!"

"Beast Boy..."

"I can't let her go..."

We sit like this for a while, or at least that's what it feels like. Beast Boy has shifted into lying down and curling up into a ball with his head in my lap. I stroke his hair and look out into the setting sun as the moon simultaneously rises on the other side of the sky. The skyline is disappearing as the black buildings are dotten with yellows and whites as people begin to settle in for the evening.

Finally, Beast Boy sniffs and sits up slowly. We're both a bit stiff; both of my legs have fallen asleep.

"...this is the last thing you'll want to hear, but she's right," I tell him quietly.

"I know."

"Things change," I say and I see him visibly cringe.

"I know."

"And sometimes for the better."

"I know." I have a gut feeling he wants to have some time to think some more. I stand slowly, dusting the bits of debris from the back of my calves.

"I hope you feel better."

"Thanks Raven."

"I miss the old Beast Boy." He looks up at me and smiles a bit.

"Me too."

"Are you going to be okay?"

"...eventually." I sigh. That's probably the best answer I'll get for a while. It's the best I've gotten so far. But to be fair, it's the only answer I've gotten.

"Okay. There'll be leftovers in the fridge. Cyborg made pasta."

"Meatless sauce?"

"There's a special bin on the shelf—just for you." I smile at him and he smiles back before I turn and head for the stairs. The sun is almost completely gone and I can only make out the door due to my own personal night vision.

"Raven!" I turn back to see Beast Boy's hand reach for mine and grab my wrist.

"Yes?"

"I...I don't want to go back inside yet...do you maybe want to get something? Coffee?" He stands up, not letting his hold on me waver.

I tilt my head at Beast Boy's offer. The sun's totally gone and the moon is almost as bright with its beams bouncing off the water, the roof and everything else. There's something that's illuminated in Beast Boy's eyes. Something tells me he needs this.

"Of course."

He flashes a classic grin before we both start to head downstairs.

"Oh!" He stops and turns back to the edge of the roof, letting go of my wrist. I see something else reflected in the moonlight: the box he made for Terra. I can see his shoulders move as he takes a deep breath.

"I love you, Terra," he whispers. I don't think he knows I can hear him. But I don't think he would care either way. And then in one swift moment—

He raises his arm back and proceeds to hurl the box into the bay below the tower.

Oh my god.

"Beast Boy! What—?"

"Let's go," he says. His eyes are shiny, but he ignores it. I nod and we both lift of the ground as girl and bird and fly away from the Tower.

_**Tara**_

I walk down the semi-lite street of Jump City. Night life has begun and everything begins to resemble a West Coast version of New York City. I was so excited to finally go. My mom and dad took me for Christmas! It was magic.

Jump City's jump a bit more balmy, being Southern California and all. I love it.

My mom and dad aren't my real mom and dad—they wanted me to know that so they wouldn't feel like they'd be hiding something. They're very generous and kind parents. I love them.

Something pulls at the back of my mind. _You alredy have a family_. I feel my head beginning to throb. Five teenagers. A large T. Yellow lights. A mask. Destruction. Green eyes. Pain. Cold—

I shake my head wildly, my blonde hair shaking with it. The visions are gone. I look around me. I'm at the corner of Murakami and Haney. I smile as I relocate myself. I know my favorite coffe shop is just around the corner.

I can see the warm yellow light coming from the store window. I know that place inside and out. I'm proud to be a regular there. I even jam at open mic nights with my friends.

Friends.

The image of the five teens flashes in my mind again. And I shake it off. Again.

I take a breath and my right hand is closed around the door handle when I stop.

Beast Boy. He's here. And not alone.

The girl across from him is another Titan. Who doesn't know the Titans? She's Raven. Short, A-line cut, violet hair. Dark blue cloak. Black uniform. Red & gold belt. Literally dark powers. I've only seen her a couple times in interviews. She seems cool.

But Beast Boy.

My head begins to hurt again. And I can't shake it off.

_"So, what brings such a cool, little chick to our big, groovy city, huh?"_

_"I go wherever the wind takes me, you know. I get to see new places, meet new people, stop a few bad guys here and there!"_

_"Terra! You're… I mean, I… how's it… what's up?"_

_"Do you trust me?"_

_"More than anyone I've ever met."_

_"Beast Boy, if you knew something bad about me, would you still be my friend?"_

_"Of course.**"**_

_"I mean, if you were really my friend, I could tell you anything. And no matter how horrible it was, you'd still like me, right?"_

_"Yes. I promise, Terra. No matter what."_

_"Beast Boy, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen."_

_"Then why did you let it?"_

_"I don't know, okay? I don't know. Slade, he helped me. Saved me from myself. He said I owed him, but..."_

_ "So, it was all a game? You were just pretending?"_

_"No. You said you'd be my friend no matter what, remember?" _

_"Slade was right. You don't have any friends."_

_"Hope you're not expecting a goodbye kiss."_

_"Terra! Come on! We gotta go!"_

_"I have to stay."_

_"No!"_

_"I'm the only one who can stop it." _

_"Please, Terra, you can't! It's too late!"_

_"It's never too late."_

I gasp. Pant. The sight of the coffee shop door comes into focus. My breaths are shallow and quick. Paniced. I look up and see my hand still firmly clutching the door handle. I release it and my fingers are still curled into a fist. I back away towards a light post and grip my hand in pain. I take deep, concentrated breaths. I slowly look up at Beast Boy and Raven through a veil of blonde hair. They're talking. Laughing. Happy.

In a small instant, I feel something. Like everything coming back to me. What I did. Who I am. Everything.

But as fast as it comes, it leaves. And I am left wondering if it's just memories or dreams.

I tuck my hair behind my ear and smile. I'm surprised to find tears pricking at my eyes. I see Raven's eyes avert from Beast Boy's for a moment and I gasp. In that second that she look at me, she seems to have registered who I am, or at least, who I'm supposed to me. She does a double take and we lock eyes. I shake my head sadly, smile, and let my gaze shift between her and Beast Boy. She seems to understand and goes back to talking to him like nothing happened.

I turn away from the shop. Tears are welling up. I almost turn back, but I stop myself. Things really do change.

_"You were the best friend I ever had."_

I begin to will myself to go back home. Mom and Dad are probably starting a movie. Maybe it's another stupid rom-com that I can hate but love anyway. That'd be nice.

Despite the darkness, I feel myself getting lighter and lighter as each step pulls me father into my future.

* * *

A/n: Wow. Well, this was inspired by two things:  
1) a comic called "Things Change" by limey404 on deviantART  
2) a picture called "Things Change" by me-n-pet on deviantART (which I used for the cover picture.)

I understand Beast Boy's pain in this (considering I've said similar things before.) Getting over Terra wasn't going to be as easy as throwing away the box. But it was a start. And I think throwing away the box was a good move on his part. The next ideal step would be cleaning out her room (probably with the Titans' help.) As for the 5 and a half months thing. Beast Boy really liked her. I think he loved her. It's not easy to get over someone like that. Especially considering how BB last saw Terra before she turned to stone.

I think Terra did remember (how much she remembered is debatable) but she ultimately decided to be normal and that she misses the Titans from time to time.

Why is this a stand alone? Because I thought it would be more powerful that way.


End file.
